Sunday, November 9, 2008

I hate IIT

I hate IIT. I hate the fact that I have had to waste years of my youth on something that is so fucking brain dead. Why did I spend two precious years of my life in one of the best schools of the country doing absolutely nothing? I didn't attend school much or its classes. Didn't take part in any extra-curricular activity. So many opportunities of exchange programs, debates, quizzes, drama, sports, concerts, parties gone waste - and why?? Not because I wasn't interested. Maybe not one of the best that were there in school but certainly with a potential. There was no better school than that to explore myself.
Why didn't I try wooing a girl there when I had full two years instead of making attempts now at a 3 day college festival where I randomly decide on a girl to talk to and it never materializes into something. Why didn't I make friends there with whom I could have gone partying? Why didn't I go on a exchange program there when I had the chance? Why didn't I play for four years of my life, something which I loved doing? Why didn't I learn a musical instrument in school?
Ohh.. yes, I was too busy studying for one of the most fucking prestigious examinations of the country. For entering a place where you are allocated your branch not on your interest (Ohh.. no, at IIT they never follow the "do what YOU want to do" principle), you are allocated branch on your performance in an examination which never told you about your interests at all. The place which for reasons I cannot fathom is compared to the best in the world - though mind you- only by us. Not by anyone else. It's a place which subsidizes education to ridiculously low levels which is just pure stupid charity because none of its alma matter bothers to give a token as a symbol of gratitude. They come here to leave. They have no gratitude for this place. This place only gave them a platform that was much higher than those around us. It did not change them or make them better in an way. It was just there. A tunnel you have to pass.
We are part of this process because we have always been a part of this process. Ever since in school, we have followed a chain that decided our path for us. If you (un)lucky enough to be one of the (so called)bright ones, you are forced to tread an even narrower path. You do what the bright student before you did. If he joined some coaching, so do you. If he changed cities, so do you. Ultimately, if you are bright enough, you make it to the hallowed portals of IIT which are infamous for reducing your interest in academics to levels that no one deemed possible.
You are stuck in the narrowed path once again. To do something here that that helps you get the best job -again according to other people- be it very high CPI, your talent in something or some "managerial" post that you managed to get yourself by politics. If you realize that may be this place is not for you as you do not want to do any of that stuff, you are in the middle of a fucking bridge where you don't want to go forward as that's not where you want to go nor can you turn back as that effectively puts to waste your whole life and you don't know any other path to take if you go back. You would have known your path if you would have paid attention to yourself in the first place. I sometimes think that compliments and wishes given by your relatives/neighbors/random stupid people you don't know are a curse as they make you believe in that ideal that you feel you should live up to even if that's not who you are. Why the fuck should I do academics/science - just because I get good grades in it. Do I have to officially suck at something so that I then look for something that I am really passionate about. It would have been better had I not gotten such good grades in school. Maybe then I would have explored myself and found something that my heart wants. Maybe if hadn't started performing "averagely" in IIT, I would have stuck with this even though I wasn't happy. I would have gone on to lead a perfectly normal, average life that almost everyone who leaves from here does. A well paying job, a house, an arranged marriage and the brand of IIT on our back that automatically certifies that you should be worshiped by people who are enamored by it or be stereotyped as self-centered, stupid ass as most of the wiser people (specially girls) in other colleges do.
So how do I find my vocation? I don't know. I am as clueless as the guy who didn't do well in school and is now somewhere in some random college (note the condescending tone in my voice). And to top it all, I didn't have fun (fun that I wanted to have) in life. That fun now seems like a basic necessity of life. The mind always seeks to fulfill that requirement first. I am fucking 20 for God's sake. When is there going to be a time when I get to do all the things that I want to do? People tell me that you explore yourself and find what you want to do? I don't know. And that doesn't seem to be important right now. I am just going through the motions. After all, if I could resist every temptation that the city of Delhi was offering, I can certainly pass years yearning for those temptations without ever getting them. There is no purpose in life. Only the purpose of relaxing, something that is not on the bridge. It's there just besides you but off that bridge. You have to jump off the bridge to go there. But that's never gonna happen. Only when that happens in your life will you even think about the higher motives of life. Right now, everything is on hold. Except time..


g2 said...

this is a really "fuck"ed up article... i hope you know what I mean ;)

Reisender said...

Written in the heat of the moment on a free evening. Was really frustrated. Though I feel that's one of my most heartfelt and honest post till date.

Rohit said...

so you are an iitian

Do you like being called so??

I agree with your topic but not the points

i too am from iit but dont like being called iitian :P
i hate the stupid showing off they show.
i hate their * names
their orkut iit tags

really if you came to iit just to come to iit,then you should not complain then
...ppl come to show off and do it........

iit as in my opinion wants you to do mba(delhi in my opinion) and disregards engineering(ps specially profs)

i dislike iit since truthfully it is not a technological college...just some hardworking stupid fellows who should for once figure out what they want to do,whether it is a girl,exchange prog,dancing or playing(everything else you mentioned).....

iit i belive is a waste of talent in india(of course it is the best..but it could easily be better)

Reisender said...

@Rohit: U say "i dislike iit since truthfully it is not a technological college".
I disagree with you on that point there. IIT should be understood as an university with the freedom and options to pursue whatever one wants. I think it is a waste of talent because so many people who are talented/gifted/interested in many other fields are pushed into pursuing useless academics which just connote science and maths. Appreciation for many other things in life is not created because anything besides IIT and science is made to look like sub-standard.
Regarding the attitude that people seem to carry about their being IITians, that is bound to come once you see the demi-god status that these people are raised to and that's what I hate about it. It overshadows everything else about the person: his personality, interests, youthful years and motivation.

IITard said...

IITians are proud? Of what?
Of getting into one of the most overhyped institutions of the country?

That, in my opinion, is stupidity to the extreme, which the aforesaid clan of genii will come to realise later.

We were told in class 11 that we have an extremely contrived view of the world, particularly us class toppers. We were content with our level of performance in class, completely oblivious to the cutthroat competition that characterises most competitive exams (the IIT-JEE in particular). In short, there are a whole lot of people better than you and the only reason you don't realise it is because your mind stays locked up in the four walls of your school.

Now extend that statement to the so-called IITians. They think they've entered the foremost technological institute in India and hence they're the smartest in the country. Makes sense right?

Unfortunately in the greater context of things, it doesn't. For one, I've known plenty of people who scored 99% percentile on those prestigious All-India tests and were unable to secure a rank below 2500. All your reasoning and analytical abilities that you've acquired throughout your school career are tested on a single day for a six hour duration. Does that even make sense? Stupid, but that's how most Indians are (I'm sorry if that sounded offensive but I'm trying to be as objective as possible).

Secondly, I've met so many people, particularly on the interwebs whose knowledge on programming and computers in general far exceeds that of the standard graduate student. Suffice to say, all these people were NOT IITians (some of them were even dropouts).

A contrived world-view coupled with the God-like status we bestow upon this institution is the source of all problems I believe. Oh well, to live in ignorance is to live in bliss - the frog in the well of the mind can't imagine the existence of a vast sea of knowledge - until it does.

Reisender said...

@IITard: Exactly my point. People are proud of clearing JEE because they see it a product of their intense hard-work(for most of them) which puts them among the top few. I feel that such one sided concentration and slogging should not be a prerequisite to gain admission to a good college when one is young and naive :P

I_love_IIT said...

Hi... i am an IITian. I make out from your post that you are one too. I think you are being irrationally harsh about IIT. Please understand that a lot of people would love to be in your place. You say you wasted your 2 years, think about those who also wasted those 2 years but got nowhere. Life is not a forced system. Its true that people look at IITs differently which affects our opinion but ultimately it was your decision. You could have pursued something else you liked like music, theatre etc in another college. Nobody forced you to prepare for jee. When you got a rank, nobody forced you to take up an engineering you didn't like. Yes, IIT does not provide a detailed brochure at the time of counselling. But dude, you have the internet! You could have looked up the course content of different courses from the UG prospectus. Even now, you could have used OC credits to do a courses of your choice.

You are very lucky, regardless of whether you acknowledge it or not. A lot of my deserving friends never got in. Think positively, and you will see how kind god has been to you.

mystic_sage said...

while reading your article, I felt it was me writing it.
I got a rank of 6000 this year...and I know why this happened...for the exact same reasons you're complaining about...wasting 2 years watching my old friends partying, and my new "friends" solving sums even in the toilet, it drove me mad. The only topics they would talk about were marks in some test, cursing some teacher, making fun of someone who got less marks, or was hell...
In the last few months, I almost stopped studying, frustated, and now this is the result.

Nikhil said...

I am an Alum of IITD.
Dropped thrice to get in, did everything u missed out in school and did the same thing at IIT. Took part in every extra curricular activity in the campus flunked few exams but managed to get my degree in time got an average job and i hated IITD, the profs, the courses so on and so forth.

I am passed out for 2 years, now i m a film maker and the way i see it , for all the shit i had to go through, iit was worth it ....had it not been for iit i wudnt hav the confidence to do wat i wanted to do ...because deep down i know i will succeed in anything i do. I m not a fan of iit, hate some aspect of it but like everything else it has few gems going for it, try to c thm too....
As for some of the assholes who call them profs just ignore them as u walk out of the campus u will meet bigger assholes and that ride wont be very bumpy because u encountered some already...

Reisender said...

@I_love_IIT: thanks for the positive outlook. It has been a long time since I wrote that 'angry' article and I have over time made my peace with it. I agree that it was my fault that I decided to come to IIT without fully knowing about myself and IIT. However, just because a few thousand other people want to be here doesn't make this a good place. That is a false statement to make. The crux of the article is still valid though - life here is really 'sad' and freedom to explore and find your calling, which in my opinion should be the premier objective of an undergraduate university, is simply not there. I didn't come here to just get a good job/resume point.

@mystic_sage: I am sorry that you couldn't perform to your best ability, but trust me, there are a lot of opportunities out there.

@Nikhil: "but like everything else it has few gems going for it" - true. I am glad that IIT gave you the confidence and self-belief, but I don't think that was the only reason why I gave JEE. For me, it was just another exam for a good university. Sadly, my expectations came before a fall.

mystic_sage said...

Guess what? I'm in BITS goa now...doing Electronics n Instrumentation....really good here. I don't feel that "frustration" or anything here in college. I have time to pursue my interests n stuff. It's not IIT in here, but maybe that's not a bad thing. We're still a great college (we're BITS after all), it's all ok now....maybe things happen for a good reason...maybe i'd never have enjoyed in IIT.

Anonymous said...

I am a guy who graduated from IIT Bombay (B.Tech) last year when the recession had begun. I sat for the placements but couldn't make through the interview for the few companies that interviewed me (for some reasons). As a result I am now an unemployed and confused IITian who happens to be a burden on society and my family.

From the above, many must have already concluded that my grades were not good (a GPA in the range of 5).

My main problem is not that I am jobless and unemployed (it is a secondary one), but that I have no explanation to people when they ask about my state. My high school colleagues who did their engineering from other colleges in different states, are today employed and happy with mostly good jobs at hand, with salaries not any less than many IITians. My state is so bad that now I completely regret being an IITian. Its difficult to face society now and I have many times contemplated running away from everyone, but the only thing holding me back is not to bring insults upon my parents.

Before I came to IIT, I had got admission into a private college in a top branch. I totally regret rejecting that college for IIT today. That college had registered 100% placements for their students. It has become so ridiculous now that I am even ashamed to mention that I am an IITian. Many times people ask me from which college I have studied and the only reply I give is "some random college from Mumbai".

I know many people might brand me as a loser, but I really don't care. I was a good student throughout my school years but was not one the college. Whats more interesting is that many of my school colleagues who didn't perform good in their studies are now having plum jobs at their hands.

Bhavana said...

I wrote "I hate IITs" in google text box, out of frustration and reached your blog which you had written months ago... I am 19, from indore and could not make it to IITs in the first attemt. Dint want to give another attempt though a lot of people asked me to.. It was shocking for my parents and a lot of close ones, to learn that I did not get selected for IITS. I was called for counselling in AIEEE but i had already estimated that it wont be possible for me to get a branch of my interest in a good college..Finally I decided to dump Engineering and pursue something else...My innate interest was the field of "Mass comm" but i was not allowed to enter it, the reason mentioned to me was" You are a girl, you'll need sources to progress in this field" ..n i felt...wth!!!!!!!!!! finally I have landed up doing an MCA integrated course from university of indore. This is the second day of my college and i find my parents still regretting the fact that their daughter dint make it to IITs... I feel so sad, sometimes I feel as if I should have given a second attempt... I myself regret too...I have a friend who unlike me took a drop and is now in IITD.. I just hate IITs coz they is so much hyope about them .... Do the 12 yrs of education in one's life dont matter at all?? its just one JEE for which people spend so much money hoping their child would clear it...!! What is there in IITs??????? A brand name of IIT makes a person lose his own identity and advertise IIT written on his forehead for the rest of his life and enjoy the dignity!!! I am sorry, i m just venting out my feelings..dont know if your blog is the right place to do so... All the best for all your future endeavours and may you rise above BRAND IIT!

Reisender said...

@anonymous: Just because you are jobless doesn't really mean that you are a burden on your family. And I know that you must be going through a really tough period but try not to get very overwhelmed about a job. If its just a job that you want, I am really sure that you will get one soon. Social stigma and pressure is exactly what I mean in my post as well. It is difficult to not let the IIT brand overwhelm you and have increased expectations as a result of it. Considering the recession, I know of Harvard graduates who are unemployed. Just be normal, find something that you really like doing and be confident. The world is your oyster.

Reisender said...

@Bhavna: thanks for stopping by the blog. My humble suggestion would be that if you really like doing mass comm, then that is what you should really be doing instead of giving in to fears and apprehensions of others. They are not always true and lead to more harm than good. It's fine to take risks sometimes as long as you don't regret whatever you are doing. If you think that you are going to have even the slight amount of regret later about whatever you are currently doing, don't do it. About IITs, there's nothing really special about them, except in my opinion, they are some of the best colleges in India (which to be frank is not a really big deal). Education in India is really pathetic and IITs just tend to have a lot of very sharp and bright people. I would also like to say that a lot of that intelligence is wasted away at IITs because of poor academic curriculum, faculty and motivation. I agree with your point that there are a lot of people who are very snobbish about their IIT brand which irritates me but I guess lots of people are snobbish about lots of things and maybe its just snobbishness in general that we hate. Just do something that you love, move beyond the IITs (they are just for jobs) and enjoy life :)

Bhavana said...

Yeah , sure, just need some place to vent out my feelings..The big banners you see with students who have cleared IIT-JEE, sometimes just makes you feel drained at times, specially when you were considered as one who could have been there..Nevertheless there's lot more to life, n I can never neglect the brighter side of being where I am.. :) Lots of future plans running in my head, lots of opportunities waiting beyond IITs... :)

Anonymous said...

@bhavana, get over it! IIT's are all about the hype. There are times I regret not going to IIT too, despite getting a seat. Truthfully, that would have been a better decision. Now that my head is cleared, it seems obvious to have gone too IIT. But I didn't. (Don't ask why, I'm not sure myself). But then, who knows what would have happened after going there? What if I had not been able to cope up with studies? What if I would have wasted 4 years cursing away my branch or the insti...So why think of what could have been.

Repeating is a horrible option. And I'll be frank, it would have been difficult for you anyway to get into IIT even after repeating unless your AIR in AIEEE was below 10,000.

Anonymous said...

"If you (un)lucky enough to be one of the (so called)bright ones, you are forced to tread an even narrower path."

How true! Sometimes I feel being intelligent is a curse.

Anonymous said...

helppppppppppp !!!!!
made into iitb this yr....btech aero sadly.i want to njoy so my cpi is around 6. so wat xactli goin to hapen with me?
burden to society and unemployed...!!!!!!!!!!!!!i scared like hell

Anonymous said...

Hi Bhavna,
10 years back i wasted precious years of my life taking "DROP" for IIT prep.I used to Top the Prep exams but I couldnt make it to IIT but made it to TS chanakya as my rank was 3072.
Though,i am doing well in my career and settled in US,I still regret wasting those 2 years.
A lot depends on Luck,and to be successful you dont need "TAG IIT".

Anonymous said...

I for one could not make it to the IITs... I did not want to waste another year and took up admission at a very good private university in Tamil Nadu (I prefer not naming it).

Everybody thought that it was the worst decision I took in my life. They felt that I could have landed in the IITs if I just worked hard for one more year. I wanted to do EE at any cost and I was happy doing my engg at another college.

But there was this burning desire within me to prove that I was not any worse compared to the IITians and prove everybody wrong. I worked hard during those four years and got a PhD offer from one of the very best universities in the US and not to my surprise, all the other PhD offers from India that year were for IITians!

Point proved! Sweet success! I am about to finish my PhD this year and already have a job offer from a good R&D institution in the US.

Reisender said...

Dear PhD anonymous: Congratulations and good to know that you have done well for yourself. IIT certainly is no 'final' benchmark for your capabilities and future life. One certainly must not judge oneself or other solely on the IITian tag.

Anonymous said...

i so damn agree that being intelligent is sometimes a curse...i'm a medical student...couldn'y get through last year....took a drop...sacrificed evrything i wanted to do...partying...girls..hanging out..just to see that gleam in my father's eyes...this year i came face to face with reality...evry goddamn cpvt. medical college in india is corrupt...u just have to see extremely dumb students taking admission in front of u....i made it somehow and got through...but instead of feeling i'm feeling hasnt even started and i'm already feeling the end of the day....its the same what we hear in the news and gotta pass from aiims or iit to have a birght future...otherwise you're doomed....hate this indian mentality!!!.....god knows what will happen to this country....i as a parent would never force anything on my children....will let them follow their passion!!!

vanadium said...

hey....u must have been very frustrated im sure...felt as if the words were screamin out at me...mayb because what u ve written exactly reflects what im feelin right nw.i gave jee this year got a rank of like 9000.they had 2 rounds for admission first round ofcourse i got was the 2nd..nothing again..i always wanted to do engineering. i mean when i was young i heard a lot about people who chose wrong career options and landed up sufferin their entire i really spent a lot of time deciding whre exactly i wanted to head...i started preparin 4 jee...still regret the decision i took...dont wanna get into all that but i really dont think jee is a platform that picks out future engineers for our sure we all hv heard a lot bout ths bt i think the teaching systems of all engineering colleges in india suck..i wantd to go abroad ofcourse that was my first choice bt i cudnt afford yah..2day was the 2nd round and th first link i found when i entrd i hate iit was yrs....i got admission in bits nw...but not to eager to go ther either... :(

Reisender said...

@vanadium: It is true that I was very frustrated when I wrote this post some years ago. Do not try and reflect on choices that you couldn't have made anyway. We are who we are because of the circumstances around us. If you cannot to go abroad, you simply cannot. No point in pondering over it. Try and make the best of your current time and do what you want to do, instead of what others tell you to do. There are faults in the education system, no doubt, but work your way around it.

EF said...

Hii!!!I agree with you on this to a certain extent.But,I feel there is a lot of positive aspects in IIT.I have learnt many things after I came here.Like you said I feel I did not enjoy my +1 and +2.But after coming here,I am enjoying every moment.Engineering is my passion.There are lot of opportunities here.The problem only comes when ppl are not very interested in engineering but come here

Reisender said...

@EF: I am glad that you have taken something from your stay at IIT (haven't we all) and I agree on the fact that there are positives to this place. However, I do not agree with the fact that people who are not interested in engineering cause problems. At the age of 17-19, most people, esp in India, are not aware of their interests and passion. The purpose of an undergraduate university is to give them that freedom and opportunities to explore themselves.

Anonymous said...

Hello,I came across your blog..I too failed to get into IIT after slacking off in +2,mixing with the wrong company which distracted me from my goal..but I got a scholarship and came to the USA,found which engineering stream interests me the most,and enjoying my academic life to the fullest..very good article..we should keep in touch or something!haha..

Anonymous said...

Certainly. And I have faced it. Let's discuss this question.

Anonymous said...

you know what is worse than IIT the stupod fucking institues that prepare you for that shit!
to all thoose who think nobosy forces us to prepare for IIT there are ALOT of ppl who force!
my parents know very well that i don not have an aptitude fro engineering yet they want me to slog my ass off!
NO one is intrestd in engineering they are intrestd in the IIt tag!
god knows how many times ive been suicidal
the worsst is that theese coaching classes make money out of your misery! and call it guidance! FUCK THEM!

deepak kumar said...

Guys , i couldnt agree more to anything else. In my opinion IITs are over rated institutions and guess wat? The credit goes to the companies who blindedly recruit people from IITs with overwhelming packages.I mean this is insane..You could find better brains in so called average colleges than in IITs.What about them? Why are they being left out? My question is to the companies.

Anonymous said...

@deepakkumar: LOL!

lonely and hollow said...

friend, i am also an iitian and i do feel as if i am passing thru the same narrow suffocating path u are talking about. i missed all that great time at school for that fucking jee, lost the girl i loved cause i was forced to believe that jee was more important than her.
and in return jee threw me in kharagpur totally isolated away from my place lucknow,away from my friends and her.

Unknown said...

Being IITian is a curse.
It hasn't given me anything in my life except for an ego and attitude. Sometimes I find it difficult to cope up with it. Unlike you people I don't even lament the loss of my social life, I was rather grateful that there weren't many girls in the college. I wasn't that social anyway and fortunately I had landed at a place flooded by people like me but that was the only good thing about the IIT. You get to study with some of the truly bright peoples from across the country. Rest everything, the less said the better.
The problem lies in the generalizing the excellence by the society as IITian and non-IITian. This is all because of the apparent brand value of the IITs created by media, Chetan Bhagat and eventually society. This brand value is again because of only 1% of the IIT students. Engineering sector was booming post liberalization. More people had started to pursue engineering. There was rising interest in IITs but there has been steep rise in interest of the people in IITs since 2005. That was the time when Chetan Bhagat came on scene, brand IIT got more notice from the people. Suddenly everyone wanted to send their children to IITs. It turned the government's head as well. It passed the proposal to open seven more IITs to cash on this brand value. It was nothing but a populist scheme on the part of the govt. to appease the middle class and show in their annual report the increase in the institutions of higher learning. Parents were happy, students were happy. The only people unhappy were those who feared of the dilution of the brand IIT. But just opening the institutions on the name of IIT doesn't mean excellence, not that the original IITs are that good but at least they have a systematic set up and infrastructure and even they are facing faculty crunch.
Coming to the IIT itself. Students think that their life will be better off once they enter to the IIT. But they realise soon that the life is not hunky dory there with so much pressure to perform, get good grades at the end of the semester and eventually a good job at the end of 4 years. Most of the students can't cope up with it. But they somehow manage to do it anyway. The education system again focuses on rote learning and nothing related to in-depth understanding of concepts. It's also not that every student secures a job after 4 years. But nobody asks them how their IIT dreams were shattered, nobody. They still manage to do something else in life because of the bright students they were. It has nothing to do with IIT. The world takes notice of only the people who are a success. Rest all forgotten and lost in oblivion.

Anonymous said...

I am in class 12th. Currently a part of this IIT procedure. My exam is just 6 months away now.

As I am preparing for IIT, I have no past really. No girlfriends, forget that I dont even really have a friend who is a girl. I am not popular, not in school and not on facebook. I get jealous when I see my friends so happy in parties..

The present? Its just plain mindless slogging. I wake up thinking about what I will study today. Never complete what I planned for today. Go to sleep. This process has been going on for 18 months now. To cover my backlog I must study for about 8-9 hours a day till the date of the examination. My father is an IITian and that makes things worse.

The future? Uncertain. Insecure. Unpredictable. I may or may not make it to IIT. Anything can happen. You prepared for 730 days for a 6 hour examination.

Thats what my life is currently. Enjoy.

Anonymous said...

Jee adv nd mains rank released a few days ago and I didn't make it. But most of my friends were not as I unfortunate as me. I actually floped on the "jee"day nd now I feel lost..confused...nd parents aren't making things any better all the do is making me feel bad by asking me why I couldn't make it.I then started to search for ways in which I could surpass the"iIT"ians by studying in another collegr but every time I end up with results which made me regret my result again and again.I don't have a gf I don't have much friends and not a responsible family.I don't even want to live Any more.all this just because I couldn't do my best on those 6 hrs

Anonymous said...

I hate iit it ruined my fucking life i have spend the golden years of my life first preparing for it then living there for two years.I gained nothing from it, it screwed up my interest in studies, it screwed up my social life, it screwed up my career i hate my life now.

Anonymous said...

i feel so lucky to have parents who have given me full freedom to take up any career i want especially since i'm a girl. Both my parents are doctors but they have never even asked me to be a doctor. today i appeared jee mains and after returning home, no one was even mentioned the exam after asking casually how it went. Feeling sad for my friends who are pressurised by their parents daily.

nodirection101 said...

hey i know this post is 5 yrs old and i may not even get a reply to it .. but i dont care .... my jee mains AIR came today .. reads 2(f***in) lakhs ... had hoped for a better rank to convince my family who are behind me to take a drop .. but after seein this rank .. i'll just have to give in to their demands ..i didn perform to my full potential this year .. but still i dont think a year can make me any good to clear IIT ... most important part of my story is that my sister is an IIT'ian .. so my parents simply cant understand y their son couldn do what their daughter did ..

smit said...

well, well, well, very good article for sure. I did not go to IIT nor did I study very hard for getting into it but can fully resonate with many of your experiences.

Just Another Human said...

Same experience here man. U stole my words ........
I am being forced to join IIT , even though my passion is singing. I have cleared Jee mains and now everyone is rebuking me for not preparing for advanced. I just want to get the hell out of this society. Wasted 4 years just for this damn institute and now am regretting......
-Another Human being who prepared for IIT

Anonymous said...

fucking amazing use of words there . its been 2 years since I didn't make into iit and Its been a living hell even if you don't get in either.and to be true I hate the word "iit" ifeel like I can almost beat the crap out of anyone who happens to be an iit or pursuing to be an iitian . even today I see kids in 12th grade all studying for like 18 hours a day just to get into the institution then what?
it isn't done yet study like that for next 4 years and get a job that's it!!!!
any iit passout ever joined military nope!
any iitian really worked for india fuckin hell nah (just earn those money)
then they have that attitude , ego as if they own every other thing . people treat them like kings and what about others , who cares or in simple words no iit no value . I hope in near future the situation must arise when there would more iitians than regular students and just what work as janitors , drivers whatever (no offence meant iitians its just a flow of my anger ). and I know I'm almost killing English with this comment .

Cyan1de said...

You made me cry. I'm in 10th Grade.
IDK what happened to your blog, whether you maintain it or if anyone would ever see this blob of shit I'm typing right now.
But this one's not for anyone. It's for the idiots.
The fucking retards who are so inexplicably stupid I'm struggling with words to describe them. The assholes who have to invade a place destined for a person who WANTS to go and learn something. The ones who are in it just for money, for job security. To them,
(I have no idea how that may translate as)
You, sir - if reading this - have no idea how, just HOW MUCH FRUSTRATION YOU'RE building up in the ones whose passion lies beyond that shit of paper. Sheet of paper. Nah, shit of paper.
There are a million - literally more than a million ballsuckers giving the JEE. There are less than 5 people actually into engineering in my school - and just 2 who are into software engineering. In my school. A convent with 500 in my Grade and 5, 10K in all Grades. What I know about all the Grades - there are less than 10 interested in computers.
And there are more than, IDK, 500 who wanna go through JEE. What the fuck?
What do you think it is, a lottery?
You're playing with a fucking life. IDK how many people consider slitting or falling off roofs under the stress and frustration they have to go through to be in the top 20% to do what they want.
WE have to slave for 2 years of our life - time that is actually the best in life to learn something, and here we are by-hearting shit someone else, a maniac probably, decided is useful to live.
And we won't have to go through that if there weren't many dickbags pursuing something due to pressurization from their parents/over performing siblings/relatives/unborn brothers, whoever the heck.
Just stand up and say no and find what you fucking are and work towards it and let us do what we want (peacefully) and if you can't, burn in an inexistent hell you piece of shit.

Anamika Saini said...

I feel the same buddy. I have already wasted a year(2015) of my life trying for iit's and now I m wasting another because of my parents. They don't get a thing I say.
I m living like a prisoner in my own house. I cant go out much. its like once a month rarely. Well I don't wanna be a engineer but I also don't know what I actually wanna be or what to start with cuz I don't get to explore actually.
All I m doing now is sleeping ,eating, watching movies that's it. I m not studying even I dropped 2nd year cuz I don't want to. I was supposed to do my 2nd year in a college and have fun. I literally blame my parents for that .BUT I also know what they are doing is for my good future. I just cant handle iit. I don't wanna.
I just found your blog when I wrote 'I hate IIT's '....I found many others having the same feeling.....uhhh why wouldn't be.
I wish all of you guyzzz have great future ahead including me and have fun that you always wanted. sayonara

Anonymous said...

Im in one of the new IITs and I absolutely fucking hate it.I just finished my first year and it was terrible.I am clueless about my interests and passion.Fuck it man life in IITs is complete fucking shit.I dont fucking understand the point of anything that goes on here.The academics are trash,professors are trash,societies are trash,mess is trash,internet speed is trash,facilities that even a local college gives.I sometimes wonder whats the difference between a local college and an IIT.Coming to IITians,they are just regular people YES Regular Fucking people with zero talent or skills in any fucking field (there are exceptions maybe one or two in the entire campus).And these guys have ZERO knowledge about anything other than movies,songs and acads.I fucking hate such people.I had great friends in high school but now theyre all gone.I miss my highschool life even though it had its own fair share of stress.God if only people were better.Cant stand normies anymore.

Anonymous said...

It does not look like the blog is active anymore as the author's last comment was in 2010, so my hopes of getting a reply are shattered.
I'm a second year UG student in IIT (one of the old IIT) and I feel exactly the same way right now and I don't know the way out of this abyss. My grades (~6.5) are a part of this problem, but that is not all of it. I feel completely lost right now. Although there are positive aspects to it, but it seems like I will never be able to take the benefits out of it as I feel burnt out already. I am not sure whether I want to stay in engineering or not, but it is maybe because the grass is always greener on the other side.

Anonymous said...

My situation is similar as yours. I hate the fact that im from iit. Iits made me lose my precious years. Bad cpi, no friends, no social lyf, no girlfriends, no hangouts, partying etc. I dint even get placed. Sometimes i thought of committing suicide as i could not bear the harsh fact that the damage caused was irreparable. When i see my old friends studying at some random colleges having great social lyf, partying hard, i pity myself. I hate myself because i could clear that damn exam. I never expected to clear JEE as i wasn't performing good in my mock tests but somehow on that cursed day, i miraculously aced it. Maybe I was destined to be here and experience four years of hell slogging through it. I have lost all hopes and constantly curse my life. My brain hurts while Im writing this. Maybe i'll cry alone in my room to get some relief.

Anonymous said...

I hate jee,hate this fucking society who thinks that only iitians can succeed in their life and what about others are they bloody fool they also worked hard for this bloody examination .I literally hate this exam and this bullshit rote learning education system where students study just to pass these kind of meaningless examination

Anonymous said...

Only a month is left , and I can't even have breakfast peacefully at my home without my parents breathing down my neck. They keep pressuring me about this exam. This exam has bent students over the sink and raped them.I HATE THIS FUCKING EXAM.